I don't think I was evermore confident that I was right then. I walked into my fathers office,with my mother behind me and with a smile on my face I s...id, "What's updad?"He looked at my mother with a very confused look on his face. She justshrugged her shoulders."What's up?" he said. "Well, your mother and I have been doing a lot oftalking." I want you to know that we feel that we are doing what is best for youand the rest of the family," my mother cut in.My father said, "You know I don't. With butterflies jumping in my stomach and a little flood of moist warmth I reached out to the stranger and shivered inside as I kissed him. Again that powerful feeling washed over me, that feeling of him making love to me and inseminating me but this time with the insight of what Paul had told me. I was trembling with fear and desire at the thought of his body against mine, of his penis, his huge penis within me. I walked away from my husband with a complete stranger and I felt so very cheap.. Rachel’s words came back to me. ‘I’d love to be there when you check out her boobs.’ Continuing my visual sweep up over her chest l saw the contortion of her facial muscles; evidence of the effort she was putting into maintaining control of her sexual responses.‘There’s no justification!’ I chided myself, but the tingling in my breasts and throbbing between my legs overrode my ethics.Gripping one of the trailing strings of the examination gown’s single tie, I at least summoned the courtesy to. I knowyou're upset and angry, but you have to learn tohandle those feelings in a different way now. Thetapes will teach you a lot of that, but nothing worksquite as well as the real deal. Now sit down, calmdown, have some coffee and a chill pill."He plunked me down at the kitchen table and got me acup of coffee. Then he moved off into the livingroom, I guess to let me cool off. I didn't know quiteWHAT to feel right then. I was still angry, althoughnot as angry as I HAD been, but more than that,.
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