'How could it have made the leap into us? Where is the missing link? Where in the fossil record is the proof?' are all regularly heard rebuffs. Howeve..., I have studied them, know them better than anyone alive and am certain we somehow sprung from their seed. Tonight, for the first time, I hope to find one, to be the first for almost fifty years to share their fragile presence and test, first hand, the certainty of my beliefs. Twigs crackle. Branches snap. The ground shakes. An indistinct black. "A friend," boomed the voice on the other end. "What do you want?" "Are you wondering what happened to you last night?" The man asked. "Who the fuck is this and how did you get my number?" I snapped. "I think you better start being a little friendlier to me Monica." "Why the fuck would I want to do that, and how do you know my name?" "Because I have these...take a look at the pictures I am texting you now." This whole situation was very surreal and I was getting quite scared. My phone beeped. And he will be ten times richer than you.”The woman said, “That’s okay, because what’s mine is his and what’s his is mine.”So, KAZAM-she’s the richest woman in the world!The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, “I’d like a mild heart attack.”These are compliments of J & B.A farmer ordered a high-tech milking machine.Since the equipment arrived when his wife was out of town, he decided to test it on himself first.So, he inserted his “manhood” into the equipment, turned on. The next morning, for my sanity, I added the 'vitamin' rule to our bargain: Once A Day.After six months, things were working out wonderfully and terribly. Neither of us had gone out with other people at all, each night was sublime in each other's arms, and our craving for more was excruciating. We didn't cross the line but we came so close that a feather could have knocked either one of us over it. I wouldn't let him stay the night in my bed because after a few nights of feeling that big hard.
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