I am shamed, once more, by the presence of this frail creature. I hear no thread of jealousy or trace of resentment in her sweet whispered well wishin.... This quiet tender moment connects three spirited worthy travelers and I, a filthy stowaway, am not fit to breathe the same air — mask or no mask. In the dark center of my disquieted mind, I slice open my own chest. I tear out my heart and I hand it to her. This vision soothes me. I allow myself to smile at the poor waning girl. Then I remember. ‘I’m a nanny,’ I said, picking up on his earlier question and trying hard to change the subject. His smile said he knew it, and I think he was even a little grateful. ‘I live-in. Beth is seven. She’s in second grade. And I guess there’s another one on the way now…’ My voice trailed off. I’d almost forgotten—Ronnie was going to have a baby. It still wasn’t real to me. ‘Do you like it?’ He reached over and grabbed the pot of coffee to top off his cup. ‘Sure.’ I held my mug out for more, too.. "Amd now that you know mine, it's only fair for meto know yours." Uh, umm-maybe some other time," he declared coldly, slamming the doorclosed and locking it, before starting the car.He was cursing the audacity of his neighbor as he sped off. This wholeordeal was getting more and more bothersome, if he didn't do somethingfast... he didn't want to think about it, but he definitely planned tokeep his distance from his neighbor until things were fixed."Who knew he was such a fucking creep!"Dan. In my real life I walk differently. With bruised ass cheeks and breasts, perpetual wet panties, I know I am His as I strut through my day. With every interaction I have, He is half a continent away, but He is there with me. I act as I know He wants me to act, I talk and present myself and give forth the effort as He would make me. I want to make Him proud and elevate Him through my actions. He deserves that. I have started to let my thoughts drift to seeing Him in real life. Feeling the sting.
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