She is a girl at age and waiting for a man to share her heat. I noticed that and I asked her to come to my house when I text her.I waited and texted h...r when my parents went out for a marriage out of station.She had made and excuse in her house by saying am going to brother’s house as he is alone and he is feeling alone. No one even guessed what we are up to and that was our plus point.She came to my house and we both are alone in our house, I went and looked the grills gate and went inside.She. I had just made my way to the underside of her breasts. I knew that she loved having them played with, so I was taking things slowly now. I traced my tongue along the bottom of her breasts, occasionally flicking my tongue up towards her erect nipples. I grabbed both her breasts, kissed and licked my way between the perfect globes and then tightened my hands squeezing her breasts until only the nipples had been left untouched. I moved my head down and slowly and gently brushed my tongue around. She pulled back from my mouth and cupped her breasts briefly, then put her hands on my chest and teased my nipples with her nails. All of a sudden the stimulation was too much for me. "Uh-oh, Marla, I'm gonna..." and that was all I had time for as my hips bucked under her weight and I started cumming. A brief look of disappointment crossed her face, then she started riding my cock, scooting forward and back and reaching back to stroke me. Every little move she made just made my balls throb. You use the English language very well, in fact, impressively well. On the other hand, the characters are wooden, some of the dialogue is stilted, and the plot is very predictable. It would be possible to spruce up the characters and fix the dialogue, but the plot, well, it would be hard to do much to it without a major rewrite. I'm normally far out of town so wouldn't be able to work with you personally, but I could give you some directions to go with a rewrite, maybe some samples of how.
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