A guy asks his waiter how they prepare their chicken. The waiter says that there’s nothing special ... we just flat out tell’ em they’re gonna d...e... Paddy was planning to get married and asked his doctor how he could tell if his bride is a virgin.The doctor said “Well, you need three things from a do it yourself shop. A can of red paint, a can of blue paint, and a shovel.”“And what do I do with these, doc?”The doctor replied “Before the wedding night, you paint one of your testicles red and. I made sure to have her come over on a day where my parents werent going to be home until late. She walked inside wearing a tank top and shorts. Her breasts were doing that lovely thing where the tops press up and over the neck of the top. I gave her a hug and felt them press against my chest. So what do you want to do? she asked, smiling at me. Oh just watch some tv, I laughed and brought her into my room. It was at least partially true. I flipped the tv on, which was playing a marathon of. She projected the desired adjustments in 3-D, highlighting the desired differences. And so it went.After her bout or bouts, Katie was to meet with her children, her former students, for some family time. Patricia, Rachel, and Cathleen had started to include them in with the older children for their martial arts classes. Katie was sure they would be tired and in need of cuddle time when she reached them. All in all, her kids were integrating well with the larger family, who worked hard to help. Before she could scream the beast was upon her. One tentacle pinionedher wrists above her head, another snaked across her face, the rim of asucker encircling her lips in an obscene alien kiss. As she gasped to breathe,a fleshy proboscis erupted from the centre of the sucker, pressing betweenher teeth and filling her mouth, preventing the slightest cry. She could see nothing beyond the bulk of the warty green fleshof the tentacle that pressed across her mouth but felt another tentacleencircle.
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