"Not quite everything," he told her. "There is much we've discussed, spoken about before. Things we've wondered about, curious to see, curious to try....Let's just say that this weekend will give you that opportunity. The opportunity to experience anything and everything you've ever imagined, or ever been curious about," he said cryptically."Could you be just a little more clear?" she asked hopefully. There was a LOT they had spoken of, talked about over the years. Their dreams, their goals,. Oh FUCKK!!!!...shut up!!! Iyelled at myself...and told myself to breathe and enjoy it, stopworrying, only joy together with him so far...all the worry is in me,it's not him, it's in me....My long walks were sometimes more confusing than enlightening, but theyalways made me feel better, and calmer eventually, and more willing tojust go.One step in front of another, trisha, down the path of submission to him.Now, I could feel a lightness inside me, a lifting of clouds, ofpessimism, of darkness. They wanted my return load on Wednesday morning, which meant that I'd have to leave here on Saturday morning; I'd have a day and a half layover with Bill. I discussed my plans with the dispatcher. My return load would be ready Friday afternoon. I told him I'd call to confirm on Friday and pickup the trailer early the following morning. I called a cab to drop me off at the motel and packed up my things and locked the trucked.Bill was waiting for me in the lobby. I checked in, reserving our room. Then, she bounced around and squealed a little, and hiccuped and giggled ... all her usual noises, which of course sounded like gunshots in the quiet of the night. He put his hand over her mouth, which gave her another case of the giggles. They made it through the night, and he hoped for better for the next night.He was disappointed the next night. She was even noisier. And every time she could tell it bothered him, she got the giggles. After about twenty minutes of that, he called down to.
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