The liquid heating as it reaches my stomach, giving me warmth from the inside out. The cold I feel deep inside my soul dissipates into the warmth grow...ng with every sip of the delicious bubbles. The effects of the alcohol slowly taking away the harsh edge of reality as my minds floats into a word of desire and bliss. A world full of confidence, vivacious remarks, erotic conversation. A world where being me is acceptable, my wicked thoughts seen as ‘normal’, where I feel I belong. My eyes close. Mind you I was young but I knew all of this was making me moist. And nervous...I mean all of me and my breasts and privates were on view through my flimsy gown if anyone wanted to look and I knew ‘you’re very pretty’ meant her Dad had looked!Then...Varda fell asleep.! I heard her breathing slow. Her Dad got up, lifted her into his arms...and carried her to bed! I was alone and sat up. Her Dad came back and sat beside me, putting his arm around me, his hand on my shoulder sending shivers. In 1977 we bought our first VCR, and Ray hooked the VCR up to the modest-size, 20-inch color television in our bedroom. This TV was located on top of our dresser, facing the foot of our bed, so that we could easily watch TV shows while we were lying side-by-side in bed, with our heads propped up on pillows against the headboard.And a few weeks later, Ray went out and bought his first 5 or 6, full-length porn movies, which took the form of VHS video tapes. And he did this without telling me.Then. "Hold it right there. This here's a toll road. We charge 15 cents fer every steer and every nigger what uses it, an' ya look like ya're ridin' fer a cattle drive. So git ready ta pay up." What gives y'all the right ta block a public road an' demand money fer its use," Andy asked in a quiet, but menacing, tone of voice."We kin do it cuz we got here first. We got a permit from the county ta charge the toll. It's ta pay fer repairin' the damage yer cattle cause." I suggest that y'all back off and.
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