She smiled."You know what you have to do?" she said."What?" You have to lighten up. Big time. It's supposed to be fun and you're making it into the tr...gedy of your life."I kind of knew she was right. I had a tendency to do that when I had crushes. I knew I needed to be carefree, to let things happen and enjoy myself all the while, or people would sense my obsession and I'd remain alone. I had to let life take its course and give me chances to discover relationships instead of obsessing about. I sit on the arm of the overstuffed chair and smile back. "Are you nervous?" You nod once just a little and say "just a little." "No reason to be, you are not in any danger hun, I am harmless....generally anyway. How are things going?"You smile wider and even though things have never proceeded like this before, you oblige again and start with "Well, I...." and before you form the next word I have moved quickly from the chair to be just beside you, you feel you hair gripped quickly and you. Finally, heuttered the words I longed to hear: "Would you like to go somewhere?"I could have screamed, "YES!" at the top of my lungs. Instead, I pickedup my purse and stood up, trying to conceal some of my enthusiasm (aswell as the bulge in my jeans). He offered me his arm and together wewalked out the door and into the winter night. Outside, light danced offthe large snowflakes that were gently falling. "I love the snow," Icommented absentmindedly. "Really..." he commented with a grin. We. Please, forgive me."I would never in my life have expected a man like him to use the "L" word. My mind was set a-whirl by his disclosure. I didn't know what to think, or do. If he were telling the truth, and there seemed no reason for him to lie, I could see how someone might take any means to have the one person he desired. What he had done to me was wrong, but it was done. I've never been one to hold grudges, besides, I had come all this way to spend a weekend in paradise and it didn't make.
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