Are Matthew and Ruth welcome in the family? Really?’ I said, ‘I’ve done a lot of thinking about them and the family. I’ve never been a Dad. Ne...ther have John or Bill. You, Matthew and Ruth are family. Of course you’re welcome. By the time we’re back their bedrooms will be finished and ready for them to move in. There will be beds, furniture and toys in those rooms. Are you ready to have them have Momma Sandy, Momma Karen, Momma Janice, Momma Donna, Daddy John, Daddy Bill and Daddy Nick?’ Her. “Daddy, that feels really good but could you do my back”?I had totally forgotten myself. I moved my hands up to her lower back and began working up and down her spine. Ashley turned her head to me and with a very sleepy voice said, “That feels so good Daddy”. “Yes it does honey”.After another minute her breathing slowed and I knew she was falling asleep. I changed my stroke and began rubbing her whole back very softly and slowly. With her asleep I was finally able to relax my body and stop. It was as if they were cogs in a machine... I don’t want to be like that, to be cogs in somebody else’s machine mindless, brainless, effectively pointless. They weren’t their own, they were a part of something else. I want to be my own man, do something of my own, write my own story, damnit! So why do I listen to dad and do this?Just then there was a knock on the door of his suite. George padded over to the door along the threadbare carpet. He opened the old-school door lock and let the knocker. When we got to town, Martha went into the general store for the groceries, but Helen stayed outside to keep an eye on all of our guns. When it was all added together, we had a small fortune tied up in our armory in the wagon, and we could not afford to lose it, especially now that we were fighting for our lives. Helen sat in the driver's seat with a pistol displayed obviously in her hand. She was left alone.Meanwhile, I went on another trip to the gunshop. I told the proprietor what I wanted in.
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