I don't know.” What the hell was I saying?!“I thought I could stay cool. I can't. I thought I could keep it mutual. I can't. But now? Today? Here?...Like this? Somehow in these last few hours it's all so...real.”“Don't you feel it?” I heard myself dare ask. She didn't answer she just looked at me with a mixture of emotions, sitting up more now with her hands at her sides.“It was my intention to really get you excited today. A woman knows how. I thought it would be a good idea for later. And I. "Well not then but later," she said."Go on you can't stop now," I urged."Well as you can imagine, I frigged myself nightly after that, feeling his hands on my body, then one day he cornered me on the landing just after I had my bath. God I can remember feeling trapped, excited and fearful all at the same time. I was just wearing this damp bath towel that wasn't very large and just about covered my important bits when he pushed me up against the wall and he grabbed my wrists and pinned them. Last time I checked we were worth about six million and had very little debt. Even though I was still in my mid-thirties, I actually no longer needed to work, but I built this business from nothing and now it is an integral part of me. I have turned the day-to-day operations of the business over to a wonderfully capable woman, my sister. I personally only handle the exclusive accounts and the political smoozing that I have come to enjoy so much. I am considered a pillar of the Valdosta. I knew that whatever it was, I would deal with the issue when the time came.Last moving of our group, was Allard. He took one look at me sitting there with a happy demeanor and his face reflected his unhappiness at Chandra choosing me over him. He pulled himself together and greeted me pleasantly and sat across from me and helped himself to some of the fruit and bread that the mayor’s household provided for us.Seeing that he preferred not to talk, we ate in silence. Postulant Dina came bouncing.
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